Spastic - he once called me
I danced and sang “I’m a jelly belly” as we arrived at my door after so many glasses of vino and too little food. ”If you feel like you’re getting fat then go to the gym” He kind of yelled it as he slammed the door to my apartment after entering.
He rarely lost his patience with me, but on that particular night he was spent. I knew it the minute he moved my hair away from my face and said, “gosh all this hair, always getting in the way”. It was the same hair he loved even more when getting in the way.
It wasn’t my fault his ex-wife was completely done with everything that was him. It wasn’t my fault he felt guilty for not spending enough time with his five year old. And it certainly wasn’t my fault that on that night this little fling wasn’t satisfying enough. What was my fault was distracting him from the brutal reality he was trying so hard to run away from. Oh, and making him feel like he was reliving his college days.
I was tired of trying and at that point learned I would never be able to give him all that he wanted all of the time. Because this man just wanted so damn much all the damn time. I don’t even give myself that much attention. Like Aimee Mann sang “no one’s got that much ego to spare”. Yah! I certainly wasn’t up for it.
I used the lamest excuse ever to call it quits. He swallowed it with his words. That was right before the turn of the new year. Over the last several months, he’s been pretty persistent with his messages suggesting we arrange a meet. Right? After his many text messages go unanswered he moves on to my friend. He has been relentlessly trying to arrange a date with her. Trill-seeker or attention hog? I’m willing to bet on the latter.
